ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!
As what is titled up above, sometimes everyone has their limits on anything in particular.
Like myself, i can seem to talk to anyone about it. It's either they aren't the right person or they aren't around to hear my plea. However, modern world people tend to make it public on how they feel in such social network which make them at ease after doing that or not. It depends on every individual.
Why can't i be happy on things i love to do and there's someone will always be the one ended up being upset for my happiness or i ended up unable to actually live my life to the fullest.
Here's the scenario, I'm a social drinker, love to hangout late night with regards i'm not working early the next day and enjoy the company of many friends. However, you are in a relationship that against everything you love. Well at first, she doesn't mind about all of this, but time slowly shows that everything i love doing are all wrong! Where are all the excitement go if there's boundaries in every single thing you love doing right?! There i am trying to adapt myself to this relationship and just do as what been told but there's always this stupid mind-set that keep reminding her that i'll always be the 'bad guy'. I changed and she still can't see that, what wrong with you?? I'm trying to make our relationship works without having arguments all the time for something silly but now i had enough of this nonsense where i can even actually be happy with my life when someone i love controlling what i love doing. Therefore, most of my time stuck in my room doing nothing, and just accepting here ways. It felt like history repeats itself where i'm ditching everyone i have in life for some love which i don't even know will last or not. I always have bad decision making for loving someone.
Now, in certain period of time, i felt like having relationship is just a waste of time or not worth having when what you loving doing unable to be fulfill, what gives!! Somehow, i just felt like going off to places no one knows and let them worried like no one else business, just to make my point clear out how upset i can be.
How i wish i have someone who really do understand me with my way i love doing in live and just join me have all the fun instead of doing the opposite. I know all of this before knowing you!! and there's nothing you can do about it! But, for some reason, being soft can be such a heartache just to please something that isn't worth pleasing.
There is so much to say but so little time to be doing so i ended up being upset at myself.
I envied other happy relationship that can be seen last long or forever. Maybe someday, i decided to be alone which are better rather than being 'compelled' or controlled for no apparent reason.
Yours Fucking Truly,
~Theodore John~
This is the poster to PSD Invasion Tour Malaysia 2011